It looks like I have two habits when it comes to writing on this blog. I always write really late at night and, more recently, I'll have a gap between entries and then post two. Oh, well. All the more choices of which post to read, I suppose.
But what brings me here at this late hour of 1:33am mountain time is the cake I just baked. Now, if you personally know me, you know that I enjoy baking. I'm pretty good at it, too. My downfall in baking is appearance. I could make the most delicious cake, but it would look like someone had already eaten it.
What started this baking adventure was when I saw that my older sister had a Cold Stone milkshake. I started craving Cold Stone. Because it was already rather late and I shouldn't be spending a lot of money on ice cream, I couldn't get it. So I thought I'd try something. I would make homemade cake batter (without the raw eggs, of course. I don't want salmonella!) and freeze it to see if it would be anything remotely like the cake batter ice cream I always get. Well, the recipe I used was a bit odd and just didn't work out.
I didn't see a point in throwing it out, though, so I decided to go ahead and add the missing ingredients and bake it. There was just enough for two cakes, so I figured I might as well try a layered cake! I've never done that before!
Once the cakes were baked and cooling, I got started on the frosting. It didn't thicken like the recipe said it would. I even refrigerated it for a long period of time to help the process. It finally got to a semi-spreadable texture and went ahead and iced the first layer.
Now, I don't know much about baking and decorating cakes (I've mostly been a cookie baking girl), but I think maybe I should've went ahead and taken the other cake out of the pan. When it came time to add the second layer of cake, it went even more downhill than this whole project already was. I fought with it, hitting the bottom of the pan, hoping the cake would slide out as easily as the first. Finally, it came out! Well, part of it. It was falling to pieces. I didn't know what to do. Finally, once a big chunk of the edge fell off, I got an idea! I would carve it! So I took a turner and slid it underneath the cake to help lift it up and started cutting away some excess. I then added it to the cake and finished icing. And voila! I had my very first tiered vanilla cake with chocolate icing!
But the point of me writing all of this isn't to tell you about how bad I am at making a pretty cake. I'm looking at a deeper level (this must be the late night hour talking. Or maybe my English class experience in analyzing the smallest things to be something more meaningful. Mrs. Smith would be proud.). What I'm really writing this about is how I started out with something in mind and ended with something completely different. I wanted ice cream and got a two-tiered vanilla cake with chocolate frosting. And, though it's not pretty, I made it work. I didn't give up and throw it all out the minute something went wrong. I just went with it.
That's what people need to realize when setting out on any personal journey. The outcome will more than likely not be what you expected. Things will come up that you didn't expect. You may feel like you're doing something completely different than you started out doing. All of this may be true, but that doesn't mean you'll be standing at the end disappointed.
My two-tiered vanilla cake with chocolate icing.
Tonight, while watching Anastasia for the second time this week, I realized an error, of sorts. Well, it probably isn't an error, but it's wrong to me, so therefore it is! I have great logic, really. Anyways! If you've seen the movie, you know what it's about, but I'll explain for those who haven't.
The movie pretty much covers what happens with Anastasia after the Russian revolution and the murder of the Romanovs (with the missing body of Anastasia, but it's a kids movie, they don't go into all of that). Well, in the movie, she gets separated from her grandmother and hits her head, losing her memory. She meets up with con-man Dimitri and his pal Vlad and they try to pass her off as Anastasia, but would ya look at that! She's the real thing! Add in some awesome songs, the evil Rasputin trying to kill her off as he did her family and some romance and you have this movie!
Anyways! To the point. When her grandmother realizes she is the true Anastasia, they reminisce and she places Anastasia's mother's crown on her head. Then set up this huge ball to reveal her to the world. Now, I get the point of the ball. It's wonderful that she found her long lost granddaughter after years of searching. And I suppose I understand the crown—it belonged to her mother and what not. But I don't get why they act like she's a princess. At one point, a man even tells Dimitri to bow and refer to her as “Your Highness.” What do they want her to do? Go back to the now communist Russia and take her place as royalty? Yeah, right.
I mean, I'm sure they didn't really think about that as it's a kids movie. Kids don't know what really happened. They see Rasputin cursing them and what not. Not the real revolution. But it bothers me.
And the reason I'm writing about this on my blog is because a ton of movies have inconsistencies like this. Do the creators of these movies just hope no one notices? Probably. But either way, I suppose it's entertaining if not annoying.
What's your favorite movie inconsistency or error? Which one do you hate the most?
The other night, while wearing makeup that made me look like a lion, I had a revelation. One day, when I have children and we pull out the old family albums (or log onto our Facebooks to go through this generation's version of family albums), they will see me dressed as a lion. I imagine it'll go a little like this.
“And here mommy's dressed up like a lioness.”
“Was it Halloween, Mommy?”
“No, I was just bored.”
And my children will be embarrassed the same way all kids are at some point or another.
Now, I know there are much worse things I could do to embarrass them, but this is currently relevant. Someday, when we all have children, we will have to be held accountable for the crazy things we did in our past. I'm not talking about how you dated Johnny but then decided Brian was cute blah blah blah. Or even how you sneaked out one night and got caught. No, I'm talking about showing the future just how incredibly stupid we were.
To be honest, I'm talking about the people who think it's cool to go out and get drunk underage or high or what have you, take pictures of it and post it all over places like Facebook like “OH WE HAD LIKE SO MUCH FUNNNNN!” When I think about the people who do that, I feel like my kids seeing me dressed up like a lioness really isn't so bad. I'd much rather my children see me as a person who knew how to have fun out of boredom than out of doing something illegal and showing it off like it's the coolest thing since Harry Potter (and my kids will know about Harry Potter).
I'm not trying to say that no one should go out and drink blah blah blah. No, I'm saying do you ever once think about how that picture could effect your future? It's like, you know your parents probably did something like that, but would you want to see them drunkenly making out with someone the barely know or something? No! You'd hate that! You'd think they were stupid for doing something like that. So why would you want to do the same to your kids?
I'm not really sure if what I'm trying to say is really coming through. Basically, I'm saying that you should really be wary of doing something that your child can find and hold against you later. Does that sound right? Yeah, sure, whatever.
Oh, and by the way, when I realized that one day my kids may see those pictures of me dressed a s a lioness? I took a special picture just for them.
I realize I've already written a post today, but this is on my mind right now and I'm sure plenty of you readers can relate to this topic. If you're a writer or even an avid reader, you know what it's like to live in that fantasy world. An alternate reality more than a fantasy.
As a writer, I often find myself drifting into my character's head. I'm no longer Lindsey, I'm Philip (the narrator of my novel-in-progress). When I dwell on that, I realize how odd and scary it is. Here's this seemingly non-existent being with a mind of his own, thinking freely into my brain. Sometimes Philip likes to lock me out (I sound crazy, I know). It's always when I really want to write that he does this. In fact, I'm locked out right now. (And I wonder why I only have 14 completed pages?) So instead, I'll write this blog entry about a writer's relationship with his/her writing. Do you think writers make up what they write about? No, they're just relaying this message that came to them.
It makes us sound crazy, but if we weren't crazy, every story would be a copy of something else. To an extent, many stories inevitably are a copy (most love stories turn out like Romeo and Juliet, etc.). But each story was given to the author on its own.
I want to say it's almost like having imaginary friends. They come in, tell you about their life and you write it down. But really it's more like having a split personality. I don't talk to Philip, I become Philip. Philip and I met Calli (another character) when looking a photograph. Philip didn't even exist yet! But the way I felt when I found that photograph is exactly how Philip felt about seeing her for the first time: Intrigued, curious. Who is she? Why is she giving me that look? And now, we've met Calli and completely understand that and more.
So to conclude my madness, I'll leave you with this. If you want to write, but you're sitting there thinking about how you have nothing worth writing and what not, stop. It's not about deciding what to write. It's about writing what reveals itself to you. One day, you'll find your Philip.
The Narrator in Chuck Palahniuk's Fight Club (I'm sure you've all noticed by now that this is one of my favorite novels by my favorite author) said he enjoyed attending support groups because “People listened instead of just waiting for their turn to speak.” It's a good feeling, knowing someone's listening to you. Not just hearing and throwing in some “yeah”s and “I understand”s in the appropriate places, but truly listening when someone wants an ear. Not waiting for their turn to talk. Something I take pride in is my ability to listen.
But one thing I've noticed lately is the lack of listening. I don't just mean someone waiting for an opportunity to tell their story. I mean the people would rather hear what they want to hear to validate their argument. And don't even try talking logically with them, they'll just ignore that, too.
And then there's the people who would rather believe they're right despite any evidence to prove otherwise. For example, you go into the doctor's office with immense chest pain. They tell you it's just anxiety, despite the fact that you've gone through anxiety and know this is not how it feels. They don't care. They see you have a history with anxiety, so that's the answer. Well, they haven't been listening to your body (or to your words) and you have, so I'd say it's time to go to a new doctor.
I got a bit off topic (though it's still the same general thought).Going back to my original point, though, people will pretend they want to listen, but really they're wondering when you're going to shut up so they can tell you about what an awesome time they had last night. If people would try to listen more, some people wouldn't need thousands of dollars to pay somebody to listen to them. Some people wouldn't have to keep all of their emotions bottled up deep inside because no one will listen.
If everyone just took the time to stop and care about that other person in the conversation, imagine how much we could do.
To try and counteract the thought of hate from yesterday, today I'm going to talk about love. More specifically, loving yourself. People have more negative things to say about their body than positive. This needs to change!
How many of you can honestly say you are completely happy with everything about you? Your hair's too short, you have a little extra flab on your belly. In your mind, these things make you ugly. But why is that? Because someone else looks differently than you? We are individual beings and should be treated as such. So what if you don't look like Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt? If you were meant to look like them, you'd be them!
But not looking like a movie star doesn't make you any less beautiful! Being who you are is what makes you beautiful. You are the only one with your smile. You are the only one with your eyes. You are the only one with your nose. You are the only one who can be you!
Tyler Durden (from Chuck Palahniuk's Fight Club, if you don't know) couldn't have said it any better. “I say, deliver me from clear skin and perfect teeth!” Having clear skin and perfect teeth doesn't mean you're beautiful. If you're flawless, you are fake. Your flaws are what make you perfect. They're what make you beautiful.
This post has been a short one, but it's not about reading my words. It's about believing you are beautiful. It's about accepting your flaws and flaunting them. It's abouat going against this ideal body shape and image and being yourself.
I say, deliver me from fashion magazines. I say, deliver me from diet pills. I say, deliver me from ten pounds of makeup. I say, we should all vow to try to love ourselves more! I say, we should start a revolution.
Hate on the Internet is a thought that's often on my mind. The thought was brought back to the front of my mind this morning when I saw a story about some act of “revenge” Justin Bieber had on his Twitter. He apparently posted the phone number of his “enemy,” who allegedly hacked into a friend of Bieber's twitter account. The boy received thousands of text messages and phone calls. And why? Because the Internet let Justin Bieber send his hate without actually having to deal with the boy himself?
You know how in elementary school, there was always the bully that didn't beat kids up. He/she would just find your weakness and use it. If you thought you were fat, you best believe that bully is going to start making fun of your weight and then whatever else he/she sees fit. When it comes to the Internet now, too many people are seeming more and more like that bully. I've been using the Internet for years now and one thing I've noticed is the increase in hate people show others. And I don't mean the “we used to be friends, but you betrayed me so now I hate you” sort of hate. I mean the hate that comes from complete strangers and pick at absolutely anything.
Even if what Justin Bieber did was childish and low (which it was), at least he kept his name attached to the issue, though he did delete the tweet a few minutes later. That's more than I can say for some. Many websites allow anonymous comments, which leads to all of these morons thinking it's okay to bring someone down. And what makes it worse is the lows these anonymous people will sink to just to make someone feel bad. I've seen beautiful people called ugly. I've seen people be made fun of over health issues the person has no control over whether it be physical or mental. I've seen people called every name in the book just because the commenter has no real reason to dislike the person. And why do they do it? Because they can. They have the option of saying whatever they please without suffering any real consequences.
We've all seen cyber bullying on the news. Some people are even driven to self-harm and even suicide because the person thinks it's funny or something. And these people still think it's okay to be like that.
Now, I' m not sitting here saying all of this to preach about cyber bullying and how websites need to be shut down, blah blah blah. There are actually plenty of people who use the anonymous function for what it's there for—to join a conversation when you are not part of the website, to ask advice without the fear of being judged, to compliment someone. I'm just pointing out how ridiculous it is that the amount of hate is exponentially higher compared to the amount of good. I mean, really, how unhappy must you be with your own pathetic life to have to bring anyone and everyone around you down to your level?
Basically, I guess what I'm saying is the people who are doing these things really need to take a step back, reevaluate their life and, above all, grow up. If you're a person that does this, I suggest you leave my blog and never come back. You're not cute. You're not funny. You're just showing everyone just how pathetic you really are.
And, because I like to hope the people who come across my blog aren't like that, I think that everyone should go out of their way at least once and let someone know how beautiful or funny or cool or whatever you think they are. Even if you don't know them. The Internet could really use more love. Let's start a revolution. Stop the hate, spread the love.
Source for the Bieber story.
Today while riding in the car, I started thinking about The Beatles. One thing lead to another and soon I was freaking out over the concept of time. Do you realize that when all of the children born in 2010 are in their fifties, they will hear about The Beatles—the band that was famous one hundred years ago.
One hundred years. One century.
Technology evolves so quickly, will they even have The Beatles? Yes, I realize their music is still very popular today, but popular culture changes so quickly and one hundred years is a long time. What if they're just left with some other musician's version of the song? Will my future children and their children and their children's children be deprived of some of the most influential music the music industry has seen?
One hundred years ago, there were no World Wars. One hundred years ago, the average working salary was $750 a year. One hundred years ago, the only movies one could see were silent. One hundred years ago, Jazz music was just starting down in New Orleans. And in fifty short years, they will be saying “One hundred years ago, The Beatles were a world-wide musical sensation.”
It's mind blowing how much can change in just one hundred years.
A thought that just came to me is what will people one hundred years from today think of our time? Will our tens of thousand dollar salaries seem like nothing? What will they think of the main stream musicians like Justin Bieber? Will they see him as a classic the way we see The Beatles as a classic? (To be honest with you, readers, I truly hope Justin Bieber is never on the same level as The Beatles in society's eyes. But that's just my honest opinion.) Will Brad Pitt be the classic actor of the “oldies” (imagine Fight Club being considering an oldie!) the same way Chalie Chaplin is?
I could go on for ages on this topic, but I'll spare your eyes and brain.
I am interested in hearing your thoughts. What do you hope is remembered from this era one hundred years from now? What do you hope is forgotten?
Source for some of my historical facts
On the elevator after my English 102 class, a UPS man boards along with a dolly holding one small box. Looking at this man in all brown, I can't help but wonder two things: a) why does he need a dolly for such a small box and b) what does one have to go through to determine that their dream job is being a UPS man? What possesses him to think that driving a box-like truck that's the same color as the uniform would be amazing? My sister says that it probably wasn't their dream job. Then what was? How did they end up doing this?
Personally, I'm afraid of UPS men. The reason being that while on vacation in the Olympic Pennisula of Washington, a UPS guy dreamed of shooting us. We (my friend Kelsey and I) were driving from Forks to Port Angeles and we happened to be behind a rather slow-moving UPS truck. As most drivers would, she wanted to pass him. She kept veering to the left to see if she could, but was too nervous about the mountainous curves in the road. After a few times of checking, she decided it would just be better to wait it out (as annoying as it was). A little way down the highway, the UPS truck went off his exit to the weigh center (which I swear was closed). Being the type of person that always watches the scenery out the window while riding in a car, I happened to be staring in the truck's general direction when we passed it. That's when I saw it. The UPS man was targeting us with his fingers shaped like a gun and did the little "pow" movement of pulling back his hand. I turned to Kelsey and asked her if saw that. She said no, so I ahd to replay the events. Needless to say, we were a little uneasy driving down the relatively empty highway knowing that this pretend serial killer guy was behind us. And go figure, I was wearing my tye-dye shirt that day. I was an easy target.
Thankfully, he never came after us, but to this day we are both uneasy when a UPS truck drives by. Creepily enough, in one of our pictures, the truck can be seen a fe cars ahead of us.
Despite this serial-killer-esque driver, I ahve to appreciate not only UPS men, but all delivery men. Without them, my addiction to eBay would be pointless. How would I get my "Christmas," as Kelsey and I call getting packages, without a delievery man of some sort?
Actually, that brings up a good point. Maybe eBay and other Internet shipping websites are what drives a UPS man to become a UPS man. Maybe they really wanted to be like Santa Claus (Which does not have an 'e' a the end. Thanks a lot, Disney.), but obviously couldn't, so became UPS men. I hope they find brown more appealing than red. If not, they must have a sad life. Though they could always switch to DHL. Either way, they bring the joy of Christmas to lame people like me year round. So, thanks, delivery men and women!
But that's just a theory. I still don't know why UPS men want to be UPS men. Is brown their favorite color? Do they enjoy cardboard boxes THAT much?
It's times like these that I wish I could call up Doug Heffernan from King of Queens. Since he's a UPS (well, IPS) man, he'd know why he became one! Unfortunately, he's not real and I don't know any other UPS men.
I guess this will be a mystery left unanswered, much like the "How many licks does it take to get to the center of the tootsie pop?" mystery before that episode of Unwrapped on The Food Network, which showed that it actually takes 211 licks.
We all have those days where we really just don't want to be around or talk to other people. You could be having a bad day or you could just feel like you don't want to be social. Plenty of people can put on a fake smile for their customers at work and pretend that they're SO happy that customer is there, but they're secretly wishing the store was slow that day. What if your job is going to the customer? There's no avoiding it.
I'm talking about the men and women of delivery companies. They have to go knock on your door if your package is here whether they're in the mood or not. There's really no avoiding it. Or is there?
There was one day that I was expecting a package. I hear a knock at the door. By the time I open the door, there is no one to be seen, but there is a slip on the door from UPS saying I missed their delivery. I was just walking to the door! I then had to wait until the time and date on the slip to receive the package.
That incident would be no big deal if it didn't happen again today with FedEx. This time, there wasn't even a knock! I was heading outside and see a slip on the door. They didn't write a time they came or when they'd be back or anything. Just my name and "l e office." I asked my husband if he heard a knock. Nope! Thankfully, the l e office meant they left it in the office, but the point is, I'm not even sure if they knocked to let me know they were here!
When I'm almost always home, there are few reasons that could cause me to miss a knock on the door and I'm rather certain that's not the case from today. Even if it is and I just didn't know, there is absolutely no reason whatsoever for the UPS man/woman to be gone before I make it to the door across the room after one knock. Which leads me to my theory that this ding-dong-dash of delivery men and women is their way of avoiding the customer on a bad day.
So, if there are any delivery men and women who have done this or know a co-worker who has, is this the case?
Hello! I'm Lindsey. I'm a writer with a ton of random thoughts bouncing around in my head. So I share them here in hopes that they reach others with these thoughts.